if not me...
If not us, then who If not me and you Right now, it’s time for us to do something If not now, then when Will we see an end To all this pain It’s not enough to do nothing It’s time for us to do something ~ Matthew West
It is 1995 and a boy sits alone at the lunch table. He's skinny and quiet, wearing a tattered Polo shirt. His name is Don. He typically roams the halls during lunch to avoid scenes like this, but today he is starved... So he eats, dodging occasional cheeto bullets from the next table. It is Friday so pep rally excitement fills the air. Don stares at his food, likely battling an internal voice yelling GET UP! RUN AWAY! And perhaps the voice almost wins. He's picking up his half-eaten tray when a cheerleader takes the seat beside him. She glares at her friends who sheepishly put their chips away as she starts a conversation. His behavior is often odd, to be sure, but he means no harm (years later he will be diagnosed with Asperger Syndrome). The bell rings and she rises to leave. He flashes a cautious smile and holds his head a little higher. They don't become best friends or eat together every day, but this is the last time he will feel humiliated and alone in the cafeteria. A line has been drawn in the sand, and a light cast on mean behavior that will no longer be glorified or tolerated. One girl, one small act of courage and kindness changes everything.
What did her parents do? Why, in the midst so much wrong, did she choose RIGHT? And how can we grow little humans who will become assets to humanity? Bullying, my friends, is alive and well... And not isolated to children. Social media has exacerbated the problem, allowing people to abuse one another behind the relative safety of their computers. And, good people, fearing they might be the next victim of widespread attacks, are unwilling to defend or protect the wronged. Like wildfire, negative news spreads, lies become truth, and wrongdoing is praised and passed on. Yikes. Thought it was hard being a kid in 1995? Good luck to our children if we don't make a stand now. We started Well Dressed Wolf with little more than a dream, a few sketches and our innocence. Somehow, little by little, our baby company started growing... and in just a few years has become something we never imagined. Along the way we have made friends (so many friends!). We've gained wisdom, honed our craft, learned valuable (sometimes costly!) lessons in business, and watched women come together for the good of each other and the world. We've celebrated babies being born and literally watched children grow up through pictures (wearing WDW!). In the early days, we jumped right into social media, joining the many groups that popped up in our name. Having never been involved in the underground world of children's clothing, it was a rush! Interacting with customers on such a personal level was thrilling and gratifying... Until it wasn't. Recently, we have stepped away from all groups (most of which are lovely places full of wonderful women!) because it was necessary. We didn't start this business to referee or participate in sparring factions of clothing lovers and buyers and sellers. We aren't politicians and have no desire to be. Our daily posts shouldn't be planned like a State of the Union address-- each word measured and monitored for potential hidden meaning or intention. We started this journey because we LOVE to design adorable things for your children and we LOVE getting to know so many good people who have rallied around our brand (and there are so many good people). In fact, a positive and inspiring community group will soon be launched exclusively for friends of Well Dressed Wolf. We hope you'll take part! We plan to pop in periodically and you'll get sneaks, make supportive friendships, take part in giveaways and have opportunities to help make the world a BETTER PLACE. It really is time to make social media a more positive experience again- for our children; for ourselves. Adults bullying one another and harassing businesses should never be okay.
As we tell our own children, you have CHOICES every day: seek darkness or seek light. Make a positive impact on the world or a negative one. Seek to inspire or to destroy. Do what you know is right- even when it isn't "cool". Don't seek revenge (no matter how much you want to!) and pray for the people who hurt you (this one is a toughie!). You aren't perfect and you'll make mistakes, so learn to apologize and forgive. Be honest, but be kind. Truth doesn't have to hurt... THESE are goals for our own lives (and business), and though we sometimes fall short, we are confident in the path we've chosen.
You're living the one and only life that God has gifted you, so make it count.
Love,
Sarah and Shannon
On that note, let's celebrate being good today. We have some sweet giveaways and links to happy places below:
- Our mantra for the day is BE A NICE HUMAN! And guess what? Our dear friend launched a company built to inspire just that! Our new favorite tank reminds everyone we meet to behave nicely in a modern, graphically pleasing font (bonus!). Danielle has generously offered a shirt, bag, candle and bracelet to one lucky person! Sidenote: you'll want to buy some for everyone you know, so here is their facebook page (where they happen to be hosting a giveaway of their own, so go check it out!).
- We are all works-in-progress. The Finishing School is a book we genuinely look forward to delving into! Several of our friends have also purchased the pre-order and we plan to work through the chapters together, encouraging one another along the way. Valerie of Val Marie Papers has generously offered a book for one of you!
- This little cardi/vest/sweater is the most versatile thing our my closets (yes, we both have one!). Dress it up, dress it down... Wear it as a long sleeveless vest or long-sleeved cozy cardi. Add a tank, skinnies & boots - and you're ready to hit the streets and make good things happen. One lucky winner will receive this beauty, but keep your eye on Buckle for restocks or similar items!
- Luxe by Virtue is a good friend's jewelry line. Tracy's pieces are stunning and available only through boutiques and high end retailers... and here for one lucky person! This brand stands for all of the things we love: goodness, righteousness, integrity, dignity, honor, nobility, purity and worthiness (a portion of all proceeds go to Giving Hope NOLA, dedicated to feeding needy elderly in New Orleans). We are so excited to share these pieces with one of you. You can see more of her glistening beauties by following her Instagram and you can purchase online at Shop Bella Vita.
I will be the first to admit I struggle with kindness at times. My instinct both online and off tends towards “What would be funny?” rather than “What would be nice?”
My daughter was telling me about school today and said that a little girl was crying because her mom left (it’s preschool) so she made the girl play with her until she felt better. I commented on what a nice thing that was to do and my son quipped, “Yeah, I have no idea where she gets it from.”
From the mouths of babes, right? Anyways, I suppose we could all benefit from a little introspection regularly. Also, who doesn’t like to win free stuff!
It’s so easy for us, as parents, to tell our children to show kindness and compassion to others, but I’ve discovered we have to do more than tell them these lessons, we have to teach them these lessons also. We have to give them opportunities and show them the way to kindness by example. Let’s all be honest here, if we’re reading this blog and following this company than we are already more fortunate than most as we have disposable income for pretty dresses for our daughters. Don’t get me wrong, my daughter loves the pretty dresses but she knows they are just clothes that don’t increase her value as a person. I’ve been blessed to teach my children compassion through experiences. We volunteer at a camp for children with disabilities every year, we visit our local animal shelter and get dirty and messy washing and walking dogs, we donate books to our local library and give toys away to those in need, but more than any of that I talk to my children about how important it is to treat everyone with love and respect. I’m proud of my children for many, many reasons, but my greatest achievements as a parent has occurred in the little moments of life… when my son stops to donate a dollar to someone outside of the grocery store, my daughter stops before class to read a book to a child with special needs, they help a turtle across the road or bring home a puppy infested with dirt and fleas. That, my friends, is what life is about, not clothes or bows or social media. Don’t be afraid to get your hands (or your dresses) dirty because that is how we replace the hate with love and change the world.
My Dad had such a giving heart. When I was young, at times it angered me to see people take advantage of his caring spirit. I asked him once why he continued to give when some people seemed to refuse to help themselves. He told me “you never know if this chance will be the one chance they need to get on their feet”. I can honestly say that I didn’t completely understand it at the time but I knew better than to question him out of respect and admiration. About a year after he died I was given the opportunity to help someone in need and it finally clicked. It wasn’t my job to question why they needed help, it was just my decision to help or turn away from someone in need. It rushed over me like a wave and tears flowed. If I have time, love or money to give then why not. It can’t hurt and you never know if it’s just the break someone needs. I pray I can instill these same values in my little wolfies showing them through example how to live life with a giving heart.
It’s so easy for us, as parents, to tell our children to show kindness and compassion to others, but I’ve discovered we have to do more than tell them these lessons, we have to teach them these lessons also. We have to give them opportunities and show them the way to kindness by example. Let’s all be honest here, if we’re reading this blog and following this company than we are already more fortunate than most as we have disposable income for pretty dresses for our daughters. Don’t get me wrong, my daughter loves the pretty dresses but she knows they are just clothes that don’t increase her value as a person. I’ve been blessed to teach my children compassion through experiences. We volunteer at a camp for children with disabilities every year, we visit our local animal shelter and get dirty and messy washing and walking dogs, we donate books to our local library and give toys away to those in need, but more than any of that I talk to my children about how important it is to treat everyone with love and respect. I’m proud of my children for many, many reasons, but my greatest achievements as a parent have occurred in the little moments of life… when my son stops to donate a dollar to someone outside of the grocery store, my daughter stops before class to read a book to a child with special needs, they help a turtle across the road or bring home a puppy infested with dirt and fleas. That, my friends, is what life is about, not clothes or bows or social media. Don’t be afraid to get your hands (or your dresses) dirty because that is how we replace the hate with love and change the world.
I tell my children to be who they want to be. Don’t ever let someone else’s opinions influence you. There will always be bad people in the world and the only thing you can do is continue to be yourself. Use your manners, hold the door open for others, pray for those who need it, always tell the truth and think of others. You may not change the world but you make a difference to the people who matter.