if not me...
If not us, then who If not me and you Right now, it’s time for us to do something If not now, then when Will we see an end To all this pain It’s not enough to do nothing It’s time for us to do something ~ Matthew West
It is 1995 and a boy sits alone at the lunch table. He's skinny and quiet, wearing a tattered Polo shirt. His name is Don. He typically roams the halls during lunch to avoid scenes like this, but today he is starved... So he eats, dodging occasional cheeto bullets from the next table. It is Friday so pep rally excitement fills the air. Don stares at his food, likely battling an internal voice yelling GET UP! RUN AWAY! And perhaps the voice almost wins. He's picking up his half-eaten tray when a cheerleader takes the seat beside him. She glares at her friends who sheepishly put their chips away as she starts a conversation. His behavior is often odd, to be sure, but he means no harm (years later he will be diagnosed with Asperger Syndrome). The bell rings and she rises to leave. He flashes a cautious smile and holds his head a little higher. They don't become best friends or eat together every day, but this is the last time he will feel humiliated and alone in the cafeteria. A line has been drawn in the sand, and a light cast on mean behavior that will no longer be glorified or tolerated. One girl, one small act of courage and kindness changes everything.
What did her parents do? Why, in the midst so much wrong, did she choose RIGHT? And how can we grow little humans who will become assets to humanity? Bullying, my friends, is alive and well... And not isolated to children. Social media has exacerbated the problem, allowing people to abuse one another behind the relative safety of their computers. And, good people, fearing they might be the next victim of widespread attacks, are unwilling to defend or protect the wronged. Like wildfire, negative news spreads, lies become truth, and wrongdoing is praised and passed on. Yikes. Thought it was hard being a kid in 1995? Good luck to our children if we don't make a stand now. We started Well Dressed Wolf with little more than a dream, a few sketches and our innocence. Somehow, little by little, our baby company started growing... and in just a few years has become something we never imagined. Along the way we have made friends (so many friends!). We've gained wisdom, honed our craft, learned valuable (sometimes costly!) lessons in business, and watched women come together for the good of each other and the world. We've celebrated babies being born and literally watched children grow up through pictures (wearing WDW!). In the early days, we jumped right into social media, joining the many groups that popped up in our name. Having never been involved in the underground world of children's clothing, it was a rush! Interacting with customers on such a personal level was thrilling and gratifying... Until it wasn't. Recently, we have stepped away from all groups (most of which are lovely places full of wonderful women!) because it was necessary. We didn't start this business to referee or participate in sparring factions of clothing lovers and buyers and sellers. We aren't politicians and have no desire to be. Our daily posts shouldn't be planned like a State of the Union address-- each word measured and monitored for potential hidden meaning or intention. We started this journey because we LOVE to design adorable things for your children and we LOVE getting to know so many good people who have rallied around our brand (and there are so many good people). In fact, a positive and inspiring community group will soon be launched exclusively for friends of Well Dressed Wolf. We hope you'll take part! We plan to pop in periodically and you'll get sneaks, make supportive friendships, take part in giveaways and have opportunities to help make the world a BETTER PLACE. It really is time to make social media a more positive experience again- for our children; for ourselves. Adults bullying one another and harassing businesses should never be okay.
As we tell our own children, you have CHOICES every day: seek darkness or seek light. Make a positive impact on the world or a negative one. Seek to inspire or to destroy. Do what you know is right- even when it isn't "cool". Don't seek revenge (no matter how much you want to!) and pray for the people who hurt you (this one is a toughie!). You aren't perfect and you'll make mistakes, so learn to apologize and forgive. Be honest, but be kind. Truth doesn't have to hurt... THESE are goals for our own lives (and business), and though we sometimes fall short, we are confident in the path we've chosen.
You're living the one and only life that God has gifted you, so make it count.
Love,
Sarah and Shannon
On that note, let's celebrate being good today. We have some sweet giveaways and links to happy places below:
- Our mantra for the day is BE A NICE HUMAN! And guess what? Our dear friend launched a company built to inspire just that! Our new favorite tank reminds everyone we meet to behave nicely in a modern, graphically pleasing font (bonus!). Danielle has generously offered a shirt, bag, candle and bracelet to one lucky person! Sidenote: you'll want to buy some for everyone you know, so here is their facebook page (where they happen to be hosting a giveaway of their own, so go check it out!).
- We are all works-in-progress. The Finishing School is a book we genuinely look forward to delving into! Several of our friends have also purchased the pre-order and we plan to work through the chapters together, encouraging one another along the way. Valerie of Val Marie Papers has generously offered a book for one of you!
- This little cardi/vest/sweater is the most versatile thing our my closets (yes, we both have one!). Dress it up, dress it down... Wear it as a long sleeveless vest or long-sleeved cozy cardi. Add a tank, skinnies & boots - and you're ready to hit the streets and make good things happen. One lucky winner will receive this beauty, but keep your eye on Buckle for restocks or similar items!
- Luxe by Virtue is a good friend's jewelry line. Tracy's pieces are stunning and available only through boutiques and high end retailers... and here for one lucky person! This brand stands for all of the things we love: goodness, righteousness, integrity, dignity, honor, nobility, purity and worthiness (a portion of all proceeds go to Giving Hope NOLA, dedicated to feeding needy elderly in New Orleans). We are so excited to share these pieces with one of you. You can see more of her glistening beauties by following her Instagram and you can purchase online at Shop Bella Vita.
I lost my mom when I was in high school to ALS. She was incredibly brave, smart, witty, but above all she was kind. Teaching children to be kind is incredibly important, but for me it’s a way to honor her. Teaching my children the lessons she taught me keeps her memory alive. When I hear my son or daughter use a phrase or expression she taught me, it fills me with such happiness. It also allows me the opportunity to teach them about their amazing grandmother.
For me, one of the most important things I try to instill in my kids is ACCEPTANCE. This plays into so many different aspects of life and fosters so much of who we are as individuals that I find it one of the most important qualities a person can hold. Growing up as a first generation here, I often found myself different from my fellow classmates. I had tons of friends and was socially accepted but things were different. I had a hard time accepting. My family rules were different, my parents were different, my food was different. Even our language was different. I was different and my family was okay with that.
Sadly, I come from a nationality that isn’t all that accepting. They are set in their ways. They would only exist amongst each other if given the choice. They have not and would not accept things as they are if they did not have to in order to survive. Generally speaking. We are not all this way, mind you.
For some reason, that gene didn’t make it to my body. Thankfully. I am much more liberal than the rest of my family. I am more open minded. More ACCEPTING. More willing. This has caused many fights growing up between my parents and I. It still does to this day. And I have no doubts it will continue until the day I die. But I hold strong to my beliefs. And I feel even stronger about instilling them into my children.
I’ve already butted heads a time or two with my parents and siblings about how I choose to raise my children. Oh well. In my eyes, we are all created equal. You, me, my son, my daughter, my mom, and even my wicked sister. Just kidding-she really isn’t wicked ;)! We all have our differences. I choose to accept theirs. They choose to critique mine. To try and change me into who they want me to be. Who they think I need to be. My kids will know that this is NEVER okay. Let people be who they are and joyfully celebrate them. God made us individuals for a reason. Exploit it for the world to see.
I have a niece with Rett Syndrome. To see my kids, especially my youngest, interact with her makes my heart want to explode with pride. She is not even 2 yet but she knows something is not right with Suki. She ACCEPTS this. She ACCEPTS Suki. Just the way she is. Suki can’t feed herself. My one year old attempts to feed her. My son who is 3 talks to her the same way he talks to her sisters. He knows he is never going to get a response from her. She is nonverbal. But he ACCEPTS that. So proud of him for not treating her any different than any other child in this world. Not ignoring her because she can’t talk back. Or because she can’t play. Or because she is different.
Even at such young ages, they get it. And they will continue to get it. I will be certain of that. Non-acceptance is such an ugly, ugly trait to possess and I will do everything in my power as their Mother to see that they never catch it. More importantly, they will know why.
They will know the importance and meaning of ACCEPTANCE, not just that its something we “do.”
Remember that just because someone is smiling on the outside doesn’t necessarily mean they are not crying on the inside. Everyone has their own battles.
I have loved reading all these wonderful comments. I screw up every day but I am so humbled for God’s amazing grace and mercy. We are parents to one little 3 1/2 year old girl who is our miracle baby. I pray every day that we may recognize the gifts and talents that God has given her and that we may be able to help foster them to be used for his praise and glory. My daughter’s birthday is mid-December which alongside Christmas means an extra showering of gifts. We are guilty of not withholding much of anything that our daughter requests and last year we began to see the challenges that come with a child who is rarely told “no”. I wanted to be sure that my daughter understands the joy you can receive when you are giving rather than receiving so we started a new tradition called the “12 Days of Christmas Love”. Starting on her birthday (December 14th) we began doing something to bring joy, love, and happiness to others for no reason besides to tell them that “Jesus loves them”. Each day was presented as a challenge delivered by two sweet little elves (our take on “Elf on the Shelf”) holding a letter. It took a lot of time on my part but to see the impact my little 3 year old could make on our “own little world” was inspiring. Examples of the things we did were taking cookies to our first responders, visiting a local retirement center and giving out flowers, visiting the animal shelter to play with the kittens and donate toys/treats, picked up litter on the side of our road, made birdfeeders out of pinecones to hang in our yard for the wildlife, and displayed $1 bills with a note to “Enjoy, Jesus loves you” on places like vending machines and newspaper displays. On Christmas Eve we had picked out items for a newborn baby and made two baskets that we took to the NICU at our local hospital. We told the nurses to give them to whomever they thought needed it most. Through that we got to know Patrick, a tiny baby with a hard road ahead of him and still remember him in prayer today. It was humbling. It was pushing us outside our normal comfort zones a little. But I hope over the years it will become a cluster of good memories that will be real-life examples of how her small acts of kindness can change the world.
Treat others the way you would want to be treated.