if not me...
If not us, then who If not me and you Right now, it’s time for us to do something If not now, then when Will we see an end To all this pain It’s not enough to do nothing It’s time for us to do something ~ Matthew West
It is 1995 and a boy sits alone at the lunch table. He's skinny and quiet, wearing a tattered Polo shirt. His name is Don. He typically roams the halls during lunch to avoid scenes like this, but today he is starved... So he eats, dodging occasional cheeto bullets from the next table. It is Friday so pep rally excitement fills the air. Don stares at his food, likely battling an internal voice yelling GET UP! RUN AWAY! And perhaps the voice almost wins. He's picking up his half-eaten tray when a cheerleader takes the seat beside him. She glares at her friends who sheepishly put their chips away as she starts a conversation. His behavior is often odd, to be sure, but he means no harm (years later he will be diagnosed with Asperger Syndrome). The bell rings and she rises to leave. He flashes a cautious smile and holds his head a little higher. They don't become best friends or eat together every day, but this is the last time he will feel humiliated and alone in the cafeteria. A line has been drawn in the sand, and a light cast on mean behavior that will no longer be glorified or tolerated. One girl, one small act of courage and kindness changes everything.
What did her parents do? Why, in the midst so much wrong, did she choose RIGHT? And how can we grow little humans who will become assets to humanity? Bullying, my friends, is alive and well... And not isolated to children. Social media has exacerbated the problem, allowing people to abuse one another behind the relative safety of their computers. And, good people, fearing they might be the next victim of widespread attacks, are unwilling to defend or protect the wronged. Like wildfire, negative news spreads, lies become truth, and wrongdoing is praised and passed on. Yikes. Thought it was hard being a kid in 1995? Good luck to our children if we don't make a stand now. We started Well Dressed Wolf with little more than a dream, a few sketches and our innocence. Somehow, little by little, our baby company started growing... and in just a few years has become something we never imagined. Along the way we have made friends (so many friends!). We've gained wisdom, honed our craft, learned valuable (sometimes costly!) lessons in business, and watched women come together for the good of each other and the world. We've celebrated babies being born and literally watched children grow up through pictures (wearing WDW!). In the early days, we jumped right into social media, joining the many groups that popped up in our name. Having never been involved in the underground world of children's clothing, it was a rush! Interacting with customers on such a personal level was thrilling and gratifying... Until it wasn't. Recently, we have stepped away from all groups (most of which are lovely places full of wonderful women!) because it was necessary. We didn't start this business to referee or participate in sparring factions of clothing lovers and buyers and sellers. We aren't politicians and have no desire to be. Our daily posts shouldn't be planned like a State of the Union address-- each word measured and monitored for potential hidden meaning or intention. We started this journey because we LOVE to design adorable things for your children and we LOVE getting to know so many good people who have rallied around our brand (and there are so many good people). In fact, a positive and inspiring community group will soon be launched exclusively for friends of Well Dressed Wolf. We hope you'll take part! We plan to pop in periodically and you'll get sneaks, make supportive friendships, take part in giveaways and have opportunities to help make the world a BETTER PLACE. It really is time to make social media a more positive experience again- for our children; for ourselves. Adults bullying one another and harassing businesses should never be okay.
As we tell our own children, you have CHOICES every day: seek darkness or seek light. Make a positive impact on the world or a negative one. Seek to inspire or to destroy. Do what you know is right- even when it isn't "cool". Don't seek revenge (no matter how much you want to!) and pray for the people who hurt you (this one is a toughie!). You aren't perfect and you'll make mistakes, so learn to apologize and forgive. Be honest, but be kind. Truth doesn't have to hurt... THESE are goals for our own lives (and business), and though we sometimes fall short, we are confident in the path we've chosen.
You're living the one and only life that God has gifted you, so make it count.
Love,
Sarah and Shannon
On that note, let's celebrate being good today. We have some sweet giveaways and links to happy places below:
- Our mantra for the day is BE A NICE HUMAN! And guess what? Our dear friend launched a company built to inspire just that! Our new favorite tank reminds everyone we meet to behave nicely in a modern, graphically pleasing font (bonus!). Danielle has generously offered a shirt, bag, candle and bracelet to one lucky person! Sidenote: you'll want to buy some for everyone you know, so here is their facebook page (where they happen to be hosting a giveaway of their own, so go check it out!).
- We are all works-in-progress. The Finishing School is a book we genuinely look forward to delving into! Several of our friends have also purchased the pre-order and we plan to work through the chapters together, encouraging one another along the way. Valerie of Val Marie Papers has generously offered a book for one of you!
- This little cardi/vest/sweater is the most versatile thing our my closets (yes, we both have one!). Dress it up, dress it down... Wear it as a long sleeveless vest or long-sleeved cozy cardi. Add a tank, skinnies & boots - and you're ready to hit the streets and make good things happen. One lucky winner will receive this beauty, but keep your eye on Buckle for restocks or similar items!
- Luxe by Virtue is a good friend's jewelry line. Tracy's pieces are stunning and available only through boutiques and high end retailers... and here for one lucky person! This brand stands for all of the things we love: goodness, righteousness, integrity, dignity, honor, nobility, purity and worthiness (a portion of all proceeds go to Giving Hope NOLA, dedicated to feeding needy elderly in New Orleans). We are so excited to share these pieces with one of you. You can see more of her glistening beauties by following her Instagram and you can purchase online at Shop Bella Vita.
I love this! As a teacher, and a mother of 3 daughters, I’ve seen plenty of the positive and the negative. The one thing that I see over and over is that parents’ behavior greatly impacts their children. Live the life that you hope for and wish for your child. If you want a kind child, be kind. If you want to rear someone who is compassionate, show mercy to others. My oldest daughter is a amazing person. She’s won countless awards and recognition for academics, athletics, etc., but my proudest Mom moment was when she bought a Christmas present and went and gave it to a girl who everyone bullied and made fun of. Someone asked her why and she said – because she is my friend. That’s so hard for a high school child. I was humbled by her act of courage and compassion. I strive to be the kind of person she is.
My oldest has special needs, so bullying is something that we worry about as he approaches the middle school years. I talk to my children about differences and remind them of their individual strengths and weaknesses with the hope they can appreciate the differing abilities of their peers.
I had to teach my daughter a lesson in kindness today. We were eating lunch and she yelled at a lady to “move! Watch it!”
I of course was mortified! I explained to her that we do NOT talk to people like that. We use kind words. I told her we say “excuse me.” instead of what she said. I then made her find the woman at her table and apologize to her. My daughter is only two but she is a very kind hearted little girl who always sees the best in people. That’s why I made her apologize. She knows not to act that way. My best piece of advice? Apologize when you’re wrong, even to your children. Always use kind words. Lead by EXAMPLE.
We love you ladies!
The best way to raise kind, good, and courageous little people is to set an example by exhibiting these behaviors everyday for them to see. If your children see you treat others with kindness and grace, help those less fortunate, and stand up for what you believe in, they will follow in your footsteps. Anytime my children are quick to judge another child, I point out to them that not everyone is as fortunate and some people have life experiences that effect their current behavior. It is also important to teach your children to stand up for what us right regardless how popular that decision may be. Just this week my 10 year old was laughing while telling me a story about a classmate not being able to shoot a basketball. I pointed out to him that the boy may not even own a ball or have someone that has taken time to teach him. He said, “I hadn’t really thought of that. Maybe I should tell him we have an extra.” I want my children to know they can make a difference!
My brother has Asperger’s Syndrome and was in high school in 1995. He dealt with verbal and physical abuse because of it. Today, he is still treated poorly by others. I think the internet makes it easier for people to bully because you don’t see the actual effect it has on a person since you are talking to a “screen”. Everyone needs to think of how they would want their loved ones to be treated.