if not me...
If not us, then who If not me and you Right now, it’s time for us to do something If not now, then when Will we see an end To all this pain It’s not enough to do nothing It’s time for us to do something ~ Matthew West
It is 1995 and a boy sits alone at the lunch table. He's skinny and quiet, wearing a tattered Polo shirt. His name is Don. He typically roams the halls during lunch to avoid scenes like this, but today he is starved... So he eats, dodging occasional cheeto bullets from the next table. It is Friday so pep rally excitement fills the air. Don stares at his food, likely battling an internal voice yelling GET UP! RUN AWAY! And perhaps the voice almost wins. He's picking up his half-eaten tray when a cheerleader takes the seat beside him. She glares at her friends who sheepishly put their chips away as she starts a conversation. His behavior is often odd, to be sure, but he means no harm (years later he will be diagnosed with Asperger Syndrome). The bell rings and she rises to leave. He flashes a cautious smile and holds his head a little higher. They don't become best friends or eat together every day, but this is the last time he will feel humiliated and alone in the cafeteria. A line has been drawn in the sand, and a light cast on mean behavior that will no longer be glorified or tolerated. One girl, one small act of courage and kindness changes everything.
What did her parents do? Why, in the midst so much wrong, did she choose RIGHT? And how can we grow little humans who will become assets to humanity? Bullying, my friends, is alive and well... And not isolated to children. Social media has exacerbated the problem, allowing people to abuse one another behind the relative safety of their computers. And, good people, fearing they might be the next victim of widespread attacks, are unwilling to defend or protect the wronged. Like wildfire, negative news spreads, lies become truth, and wrongdoing is praised and passed on. Yikes. Thought it was hard being a kid in 1995? Good luck to our children if we don't make a stand now. We started Well Dressed Wolf with little more than a dream, a few sketches and our innocence. Somehow, little by little, our baby company started growing... and in just a few years has become something we never imagined. Along the way we have made friends (so many friends!). We've gained wisdom, honed our craft, learned valuable (sometimes costly!) lessons in business, and watched women come together for the good of each other and the world. We've celebrated babies being born and literally watched children grow up through pictures (wearing WDW!). In the early days, we jumped right into social media, joining the many groups that popped up in our name. Having never been involved in the underground world of children's clothing, it was a rush! Interacting with customers on such a personal level was thrilling and gratifying... Until it wasn't. Recently, we have stepped away from all groups (most of which are lovely places full of wonderful women!) because it was necessary. We didn't start this business to referee or participate in sparring factions of clothing lovers and buyers and sellers. We aren't politicians and have no desire to be. Our daily posts shouldn't be planned like a State of the Union address-- each word measured and monitored for potential hidden meaning or intention. We started this journey because we LOVE to design adorable things for your children and we LOVE getting to know so many good people who have rallied around our brand (and there are so many good people). In fact, a positive and inspiring community group will soon be launched exclusively for friends of Well Dressed Wolf. We hope you'll take part! We plan to pop in periodically and you'll get sneaks, make supportive friendships, take part in giveaways and have opportunities to help make the world a BETTER PLACE. It really is time to make social media a more positive experience again- for our children; for ourselves. Adults bullying one another and harassing businesses should never be okay.
As we tell our own children, you have CHOICES every day: seek darkness or seek light. Make a positive impact on the world or a negative one. Seek to inspire or to destroy. Do what you know is right- even when it isn't "cool". Don't seek revenge (no matter how much you want to!) and pray for the people who hurt you (this one is a toughie!). You aren't perfect and you'll make mistakes, so learn to apologize and forgive. Be honest, but be kind. Truth doesn't have to hurt... THESE are goals for our own lives (and business), and though we sometimes fall short, we are confident in the path we've chosen.
You're living the one and only life that God has gifted you, so make it count.
Love,
Sarah and Shannon
On that note, let's celebrate being good today. We have some sweet giveaways and links to happy places below:
- Our mantra for the day is BE A NICE HUMAN! And guess what? Our dear friend launched a company built to inspire just that! Our new favorite tank reminds everyone we meet to behave nicely in a modern, graphically pleasing font (bonus!). Danielle has generously offered a shirt, bag, candle and bracelet to one lucky person! Sidenote: you'll want to buy some for everyone you know, so here is their facebook page (where they happen to be hosting a giveaway of their own, so go check it out!).
- We are all works-in-progress. The Finishing School is a book we genuinely look forward to delving into! Several of our friends have also purchased the pre-order and we plan to work through the chapters together, encouraging one another along the way. Valerie of Val Marie Papers has generously offered a book for one of you!
- This little cardi/vest/sweater is the most versatile thing our my closets (yes, we both have one!). Dress it up, dress it down... Wear it as a long sleeveless vest or long-sleeved cozy cardi. Add a tank, skinnies & boots - and you're ready to hit the streets and make good things happen. One lucky winner will receive this beauty, but keep your eye on Buckle for restocks or similar items!
- Luxe by Virtue is a good friend's jewelry line. Tracy's pieces are stunning and available only through boutiques and high end retailers... and here for one lucky person! This brand stands for all of the things we love: goodness, righteousness, integrity, dignity, honor, nobility, purity and worthiness (a portion of all proceeds go to Giving Hope NOLA, dedicated to feeding needy elderly in New Orleans). We are so excited to share these pieces with one of you. You can see more of her glistening beauties by following her Instagram and you can purchase online at Shop Bella Vita.
Growing up I was taughed the song “Love is…” From my mom and grandma that sang it to me over and over. I love to sing it to my children and remind them to always keep love in their heart always and to love everyone as God loves us. I’m sure many have heard it before, Here is the song and it has a great message:
‘Love is a very special thing, a smile, a tear, a soft summer rain. It has no beginning it has no end, but I like it best when it’s shared with a friend. Love is never stuffed up, ever puffed up, never gives up when the going’s rough. It’s the biggest little word you can say by the way. It’s sympathy, sincerity, it’s charity the main variety of everything happiness is made of and I like it best when it’s shared with a friend.
I always tell my boys to make doing the right thing look “cool” even if it’s not! Do it with confidence and poise and always treat other with respect and kindness NO MATTER WHAT!
I know this has been said over and over again, but modeling kindness as a parent is by far the best way to teach. Kindness to your spouse and your children. My mom used to quote scripture to myself and my brothers when we were growing up, and it used to make me crazy! But I find myself doing the same thing to my little girl (and sometimes even my husband). Her favorites were “be angry, but sin not” and “a soft answer turns away wrath”. Makes me feel blessed that I had a wonderful mama who modeled these truths to me!!
Thank you for such a timeless and always needed blog post S&S.
The advice I would give to parents to help raise men and women who choose love, kindness, generosity and the fruits of the spirit, is to share the Gospel with them…the Love of a Savior. Life on earth is temporary but heaven is eternal. If you teach your children to love and serve Jesus at an early age, which in turn will create serving and loving others, then their reward will be in Heaven. Explain to them that in everything that they do, they should do it for the Glory of God and nothing else. If what they are doing does not align with his word, nor does it bring him glory, then they need to seek the Lord for wisdom and conviction. Most of all, choose love. Love others, just as God loves us. He loved us enough to allow his son to die on the cross for our sins so that we might have eternal life! That is love and if they truly love as he does, then their speech, their actions and everything that they do should reflect that. As a mother of two young children, my greatest hope is that they come to know the love of a Savior because at the end of this life, that’s what matters.
I love this quote which is taken from ‘Once a Day at the Table’ and hope it will always reflect us as a “Wolfpack!”
“The body of Christ is designed to work together. If we ignore a brother or sister’s need, we are ignoring Jesus, and we are weakening the body of Christ. The early church had it rough. They faced significant persecution. But they worked together, and they stayed strong. So should we.”
Love S&S and the WDW Family!
-Tracy Barefoot
Thank you for the beautifully worded reminders. My daughter was just diagnosed with Asperger’s and it’s so difficult to watch her struggle with friendships and other social issues. But, her best friend’s mom spent time talking to her daughter about kids with special needs. Her friend is understanding, patient, and just watching them interact brings tears to my eyes. I’m so thankful to the moms I know who are accepting and who are making sure to raise girls who are accepting, compassionate, and kind. How we treat people is how we will see our children one day treat people.