if not me...
If not us, then who If not me and you Right now, it’s time for us to do something If not now, then when Will we see an end To all this pain It’s not enough to do nothing It’s time for us to do something ~ Matthew West
It is 1995 and a boy sits alone at the lunch table. He's skinny and quiet, wearing a tattered Polo shirt. His name is Don. He typically roams the halls during lunch to avoid scenes like this, but today he is starved... So he eats, dodging occasional cheeto bullets from the next table. It is Friday so pep rally excitement fills the air. Don stares at his food, likely battling an internal voice yelling GET UP! RUN AWAY! And perhaps the voice almost wins. He's picking up his half-eaten tray when a cheerleader takes the seat beside him. She glares at her friends who sheepishly put their chips away as she starts a conversation. His behavior is often odd, to be sure, but he means no harm (years later he will be diagnosed with Asperger Syndrome). The bell rings and she rises to leave. He flashes a cautious smile and holds his head a little higher. They don't become best friends or eat together every day, but this is the last time he will feel humiliated and alone in the cafeteria. A line has been drawn in the sand, and a light cast on mean behavior that will no longer be glorified or tolerated. One girl, one small act of courage and kindness changes everything.
What did her parents do? Why, in the midst so much wrong, did she choose RIGHT? And how can we grow little humans who will become assets to humanity? Bullying, my friends, is alive and well... And not isolated to children. Social media has exacerbated the problem, allowing people to abuse one another behind the relative safety of their computers. And, good people, fearing they might be the next victim of widespread attacks, are unwilling to defend or protect the wronged. Like wildfire, negative news spreads, lies become truth, and wrongdoing is praised and passed on. Yikes. Thought it was hard being a kid in 1995? Good luck to our children if we don't make a stand now. We started Well Dressed Wolf with little more than a dream, a few sketches and our innocence. Somehow, little by little, our baby company started growing... and in just a few years has become something we never imagined. Along the way we have made friends (so many friends!). We've gained wisdom, honed our craft, learned valuable (sometimes costly!) lessons in business, and watched women come together for the good of each other and the world. We've celebrated babies being born and literally watched children grow up through pictures (wearing WDW!). In the early days, we jumped right into social media, joining the many groups that popped up in our name. Having never been involved in the underground world of children's clothing, it was a rush! Interacting with customers on such a personal level was thrilling and gratifying... Until it wasn't. Recently, we have stepped away from all groups (most of which are lovely places full of wonderful women!) because it was necessary. We didn't start this business to referee or participate in sparring factions of clothing lovers and buyers and sellers. We aren't politicians and have no desire to be. Our daily posts shouldn't be planned like a State of the Union address-- each word measured and monitored for potential hidden meaning or intention. We started this journey because we LOVE to design adorable things for your children and we LOVE getting to know so many good people who have rallied around our brand (and there are so many good people). In fact, a positive and inspiring community group will soon be launched exclusively for friends of Well Dressed Wolf. We hope you'll take part! We plan to pop in periodically and you'll get sneaks, make supportive friendships, take part in giveaways and have opportunities to help make the world a BETTER PLACE. It really is time to make social media a more positive experience again- for our children; for ourselves. Adults bullying one another and harassing businesses should never be okay.
As we tell our own children, you have CHOICES every day: seek darkness or seek light. Make a positive impact on the world or a negative one. Seek to inspire or to destroy. Do what you know is right- even when it isn't "cool". Don't seek revenge (no matter how much you want to!) and pray for the people who hurt you (this one is a toughie!). You aren't perfect and you'll make mistakes, so learn to apologize and forgive. Be honest, but be kind. Truth doesn't have to hurt... THESE are goals for our own lives (and business), and though we sometimes fall short, we are confident in the path we've chosen.
You're living the one and only life that God has gifted you, so make it count.
Love,
Sarah and Shannon
On that note, let's celebrate being good today. We have some sweet giveaways and links to happy places below:
- Our mantra for the day is BE A NICE HUMAN! And guess what? Our dear friend launched a company built to inspire just that! Our new favorite tank reminds everyone we meet to behave nicely in a modern, graphically pleasing font (bonus!). Danielle has generously offered a shirt, bag, candle and bracelet to one lucky person! Sidenote: you'll want to buy some for everyone you know, so here is their facebook page (where they happen to be hosting a giveaway of their own, so go check it out!).
- We are all works-in-progress. The Finishing School is a book we genuinely look forward to delving into! Several of our friends have also purchased the pre-order and we plan to work through the chapters together, encouraging one another along the way. Valerie of Val Marie Papers has generously offered a book for one of you!
- This little cardi/vest/sweater is the most versatile thing our my closets (yes, we both have one!). Dress it up, dress it down... Wear it as a long sleeveless vest or long-sleeved cozy cardi. Add a tank, skinnies & boots - and you're ready to hit the streets and make good things happen. One lucky winner will receive this beauty, but keep your eye on Buckle for restocks or similar items!
- Luxe by Virtue is a good friend's jewelry line. Tracy's pieces are stunning and available only through boutiques and high end retailers... and here for one lucky person! This brand stands for all of the things we love: goodness, righteousness, integrity, dignity, honor, nobility, purity and worthiness (a portion of all proceeds go to Giving Hope NOLA, dedicated to feeding needy elderly in New Orleans). We are so excited to share these pieces with one of you. You can see more of her glistening beauties by following her Instagram and you can purchase online at Shop Bella Vita.
We had two rules growing up:
1) treat others the way you would want them to treat you
2) if you have nothing nice to say don’t say anything at all
I have tried to instill the same principle in my own children.
Thank you, this is a great idea! I think the one piece of advice that I heard and really use every hour of every day with my little ones is this: stop saying it, and start doing it. Be the change. So, instead of telling them to do something, I model it myself, and do it with them— not only do we have more fun and more health and more kindness (exercising, eating, playing, cleaning, reading, learning, talking, and exploring!), but we do it together <3
Being purposeful about the example I'm setting is good juju for me, too. And, I must admit, my heart does a little happy dance when I see the upwards spiral, when Big Sister has learned something (saying 'thank you's and 'please' and offering to help, and small acts of kindness), and she begins to teach her little brother the same…. heart melt! What we pass on to the next generation doesn't have to be the fears and flawed expectations our parents might have given us- we DO have the opportunity to break the cycle, and support our beautiful little people, and that really is making the world a better place <3
As a child, I was ridiculed for the glasses on my face and my need for acceptance. I tried acting cool, but ultimately my quirkiness left me often alone. I don’t want my children growing up thinking they have to PLAY A ROLE. Being made in His image means that their personalities were perfectly planned and should be embraced. This doesn’t just apply to them, it applies to people in their lives. Teaching them to be kind and humble first and foremost isn’t easy, but is imperative for a growing world. The Lord commanded that we love one another. He is the one my trust lies in, and I hope they can say they grew up knowing how to treat people because they saw to “do as I say” AND as I do.
Do unto others as you’d have done to you. . .I try to remember that I am my children’s best teacher. My girls look to me for comfort, advice, love and support and to know the right thing to do. Speaking kindly and thinking kindly of others is something I hope I’ve taught them and will continue to teach them. . .and most of all I teach them that winning isn’t everything. It’s okay if you don’t get what you think you wanted – because there’s something better waiting. . .just give it time.
First of all, a parent leads by example. Our kids see and absorb the way we treat others. Unspoken lessons in kindness (or not) are shown every day though our actions as parents. I try to give my daughters some tangible ways they can be kind to others. Growing up in a family who moved around a lot, I know how difficult it is to be the new girl. I try to direct my daughters to reach their hand out to a new face, offering a hello or even a smile. That simple gesture makes a serious impression on that girls day. Befriending someone new is important and really makes a difference.