if not me...
If not us, then who If not me and you Right now, it’s time for us to do something If not now, then when Will we see an end To all this pain It’s not enough to do nothing It’s time for us to do something ~ Matthew West
It is 1995 and a boy sits alone at the lunch table. He's skinny and quiet, wearing a tattered Polo shirt. His name is Don. He typically roams the halls during lunch to avoid scenes like this, but today he is starved... So he eats, dodging occasional cheeto bullets from the next table. It is Friday so pep rally excitement fills the air. Don stares at his food, likely battling an internal voice yelling GET UP! RUN AWAY! And perhaps the voice almost wins. He's picking up his half-eaten tray when a cheerleader takes the seat beside him. She glares at her friends who sheepishly put their chips away as she starts a conversation. His behavior is often odd, to be sure, but he means no harm (years later he will be diagnosed with Asperger Syndrome). The bell rings and she rises to leave. He flashes a cautious smile and holds his head a little higher. They don't become best friends or eat together every day, but this is the last time he will feel humiliated and alone in the cafeteria. A line has been drawn in the sand, and a light cast on mean behavior that will no longer be glorified or tolerated. One girl, one small act of courage and kindness changes everything.
What did her parents do? Why, in the midst so much wrong, did she choose RIGHT? And how can we grow little humans who will become assets to humanity? Bullying, my friends, is alive and well... And not isolated to children. Social media has exacerbated the problem, allowing people to abuse one another behind the relative safety of their computers. And, good people, fearing they might be the next victim of widespread attacks, are unwilling to defend or protect the wronged. Like wildfire, negative news spreads, lies become truth, and wrongdoing is praised and passed on. Yikes. Thought it was hard being a kid in 1995? Good luck to our children if we don't make a stand now. We started Well Dressed Wolf with little more than a dream, a few sketches and our innocence. Somehow, little by little, our baby company started growing... and in just a few years has become something we never imagined. Along the way we have made friends (so many friends!). We've gained wisdom, honed our craft, learned valuable (sometimes costly!) lessons in business, and watched women come together for the good of each other and the world. We've celebrated babies being born and literally watched children grow up through pictures (wearing WDW!). In the early days, we jumped right into social media, joining the many groups that popped up in our name. Having never been involved in the underground world of children's clothing, it was a rush! Interacting with customers on such a personal level was thrilling and gratifying... Until it wasn't. Recently, we have stepped away from all groups (most of which are lovely places full of wonderful women!) because it was necessary. We didn't start this business to referee or participate in sparring factions of clothing lovers and buyers and sellers. We aren't politicians and have no desire to be. Our daily posts shouldn't be planned like a State of the Union address-- each word measured and monitored for potential hidden meaning or intention. We started this journey because we LOVE to design adorable things for your children and we LOVE getting to know so many good people who have rallied around our brand (and there are so many good people). In fact, a positive and inspiring community group will soon be launched exclusively for friends of Well Dressed Wolf. We hope you'll take part! We plan to pop in periodically and you'll get sneaks, make supportive friendships, take part in giveaways and have opportunities to help make the world a BETTER PLACE. It really is time to make social media a more positive experience again- for our children; for ourselves. Adults bullying one another and harassing businesses should never be okay.
As we tell our own children, you have CHOICES every day: seek darkness or seek light. Make a positive impact on the world or a negative one. Seek to inspire or to destroy. Do what you know is right- even when it isn't "cool". Don't seek revenge (no matter how much you want to!) and pray for the people who hurt you (this one is a toughie!). You aren't perfect and you'll make mistakes, so learn to apologize and forgive. Be honest, but be kind. Truth doesn't have to hurt... THESE are goals for our own lives (and business), and though we sometimes fall short, we are confident in the path we've chosen.
You're living the one and only life that God has gifted you, so make it count.
Love,
Sarah and Shannon
On that note, let's celebrate being good today. We have some sweet giveaways and links to happy places below:
- Our mantra for the day is BE A NICE HUMAN! And guess what? Our dear friend launched a company built to inspire just that! Our new favorite tank reminds everyone we meet to behave nicely in a modern, graphically pleasing font (bonus!). Danielle has generously offered a shirt, bag, candle and bracelet to one lucky person! Sidenote: you'll want to buy some for everyone you know, so here is their facebook page (where they happen to be hosting a giveaway of their own, so go check it out!).
- We are all works-in-progress. The Finishing School is a book we genuinely look forward to delving into! Several of our friends have also purchased the pre-order and we plan to work through the chapters together, encouraging one another along the way. Valerie of Val Marie Papers has generously offered a book for one of you!
- This little cardi/vest/sweater is the most versatile thing our my closets (yes, we both have one!). Dress it up, dress it down... Wear it as a long sleeveless vest or long-sleeved cozy cardi. Add a tank, skinnies & boots - and you're ready to hit the streets and make good things happen. One lucky winner will receive this beauty, but keep your eye on Buckle for restocks or similar items!
- Luxe by Virtue is a good friend's jewelry line. Tracy's pieces are stunning and available only through boutiques and high end retailers... and here for one lucky person! This brand stands for all of the things we love: goodness, righteousness, integrity, dignity, honor, nobility, purity and worthiness (a portion of all proceeds go to Giving Hope NOLA, dedicated to feeding needy elderly in New Orleans). We are so excited to share these pieces with one of you. You can see more of her glistening beauties by following her Instagram and you can purchase online at Shop Bella Vita.
I am a high school Counselor and the best advice I could think to give was make time for your children. Children love things but more than anything they love mama and daddy, whether they admit it out not. Our children want attention and despite best intentions they don’t need another friend; they need a mentor and unconditional love. Make family important. Join together for a meal. Tell them about your day and ask about their day. Keep an eye on what they do and friends they have. Like adults, children need discipline. Not spankings but more of a moral compass for right and wrong. Take time to point out the great things and address the wrongs.
I would try to offer advice based on the way I try to parent. I think teaching your child to be gracious, caring, loving, and joyful.
To bring love and laughter into every room you walk in. To look to The Lord in all things. When you are going through times of sadness praise him and find strength in him. When you are going through fearful times praise him and Find strength in him. When you are going through times of happiness and joy praise him and thank him for everything you have. Teach them to not be scared to be there self ! Tell them to love yourself for all of your unique things that make you who you are. Teach them not to be someone to point at or make fun of someone who is different or has a disability tell them to be strong for them and reach a hand out to them and be there for them. Smile a LOT and let them know they are not alone, and. Let them know you love them no matter what! It’s easy to be hard on yourself as a parent lord knows I am far from perfect but make the corner stone of your family The Lord. And make every moment count! Let him lead you and your children down the right path. Be understanding, teach them to try there very best to make good decisions but if they make a poor choice let them know you will be there for them and use it as a teaching moment. Teach them to be leaders and not followers to enjoy life from the front of the pack. Let them know they already have every single thing they need to be a good person. They are perfect in your eyes and the eyes of The Lord. Differences are what make this world what it is. Do not live life in fear. Be strong. Be courageous. Be kind. Be true. Try to being light I to moments of dark. Don’t be afraid to ask for help for yourself or others. Don’t sit by and let someone be hurt stand up for what you believe in and fight for what is right. I want my children to not be scared to stand up to someone doing something terrible to one of their friends. Be a voice, and be heard ! Love one another, and teach them to try to chane the world every day for the better!! My last peice of advice for my fellow moms is love your self! Love your children! You are doing the very best you can and it’s not an easy job. The most important thing is to LOVE your kids and make sure they know that without doubt.
With the world seeming more and more dangerous, materialistic, and self entitled it is harder for parents to teach their kids how to brave the world with a kind spirit. It is hard because we as parents get wrapped up in the media driven world and forget that most important task we have is right under our noses- our children. As I’m writing this post, I am at the beach this week with my kids. I just put them to bed and took out my phone. Until now there has not been a lot of tech time. It’s been just the kids and I running in the sand, visiting a butterly garden, and taking walks after supper. When I’m scared of something, I do not let my children see my fear. I teach them to be cautious but brave. My son who is extremely wild got a phone call from his teacher. I couldn’t imagine what he had done. She was calling me however to tell me that he helped all the kids in his class who missed their moms by rubbing their backs and telling them she would be there soon. I got a lump in my throat just hearing the teacher tell me that. Score one for me! Somewhere my wild boy hears my praises and sees my kindness. I’m not perfect and I have knock you to your knees kind of days nut I try to always stay calm. One friend once said- how are you always so calm? I told her what good would it do my kids to see a momma going crazy! Keep doing those good deeds mommies. Your kids are watching! And when you least expect it, they will imitate you in the most flattering way.
I wish I could give you the perfect recipe. The truth is that because we are all imperfect people, we can only try our best. In our home trying out best means sitting down for family meals, never being afraid to let our children make mistakes, showing love and kindness to ourselves and others, being fearless in trying new things and also laughing when those things didn’t work out the way we planned, unplugging from our distractions and enjoying the simple pleasures in life, teaching responsibility through demonstration and just plain ol’ love for our neighbors and for the world we live in.
Parents remember: Good days will follow bad days and life will certainly bring surprises and twists. Just hold on tight to each other and make memories and eternal bonds that will carry you through it all! All things grow with love <3
please remember to be kind as everyone had battles that you don’t know about. Kind is the new friend!