if not me...
If not us, then who If not me and you Right now, it’s time for us to do something If not now, then when Will we see an end To all this pain It’s not enough to do nothing It’s time for us to do something ~ Matthew West
It is 1995 and a boy sits alone at the lunch table. He's skinny and quiet, wearing a tattered Polo shirt. His name is Don. He typically roams the halls during lunch to avoid scenes like this, but today he is starved... So he eats, dodging occasional cheeto bullets from the next table. It is Friday so pep rally excitement fills the air. Don stares at his food, likely battling an internal voice yelling GET UP! RUN AWAY! And perhaps the voice almost wins. He's picking up his half-eaten tray when a cheerleader takes the seat beside him. She glares at her friends who sheepishly put their chips away as she starts a conversation. His behavior is often odd, to be sure, but he means no harm (years later he will be diagnosed with Asperger Syndrome). The bell rings and she rises to leave. He flashes a cautious smile and holds his head a little higher. They don't become best friends or eat together every day, but this is the last time he will feel humiliated and alone in the cafeteria. A line has been drawn in the sand, and a light cast on mean behavior that will no longer be glorified or tolerated. One girl, one small act of courage and kindness changes everything.
What did her parents do? Why, in the midst so much wrong, did she choose RIGHT? And how can we grow little humans who will become assets to humanity? Bullying, my friends, is alive and well... And not isolated to children. Social media has exacerbated the problem, allowing people to abuse one another behind the relative safety of their computers. And, good people, fearing they might be the next victim of widespread attacks, are unwilling to defend or protect the wronged. Like wildfire, negative news spreads, lies become truth, and wrongdoing is praised and passed on. Yikes. Thought it was hard being a kid in 1995? Good luck to our children if we don't make a stand now. We started Well Dressed Wolf with little more than a dream, a few sketches and our innocence. Somehow, little by little, our baby company started growing... and in just a few years has become something we never imagined. Along the way we have made friends (so many friends!). We've gained wisdom, honed our craft, learned valuable (sometimes costly!) lessons in business, and watched women come together for the good of each other and the world. We've celebrated babies being born and literally watched children grow up through pictures (wearing WDW!). In the early days, we jumped right into social media, joining the many groups that popped up in our name. Having never been involved in the underground world of children's clothing, it was a rush! Interacting with customers on such a personal level was thrilling and gratifying... Until it wasn't. Recently, we have stepped away from all groups (most of which are lovely places full of wonderful women!) because it was necessary. We didn't start this business to referee or participate in sparring factions of clothing lovers and buyers and sellers. We aren't politicians and have no desire to be. Our daily posts shouldn't be planned like a State of the Union address-- each word measured and monitored for potential hidden meaning or intention. We started this journey because we LOVE to design adorable things for your children and we LOVE getting to know so many good people who have rallied around our brand (and there are so many good people). In fact, a positive and inspiring community group will soon be launched exclusively for friends of Well Dressed Wolf. We hope you'll take part! We plan to pop in periodically and you'll get sneaks, make supportive friendships, take part in giveaways and have opportunities to help make the world a BETTER PLACE. It really is time to make social media a more positive experience again- for our children; for ourselves. Adults bullying one another and harassing businesses should never be okay.
As we tell our own children, you have CHOICES every day: seek darkness or seek light. Make a positive impact on the world or a negative one. Seek to inspire or to destroy. Do what you know is right- even when it isn't "cool". Don't seek revenge (no matter how much you want to!) and pray for the people who hurt you (this one is a toughie!). You aren't perfect and you'll make mistakes, so learn to apologize and forgive. Be honest, but be kind. Truth doesn't have to hurt... THESE are goals for our own lives (and business), and though we sometimes fall short, we are confident in the path we've chosen.
You're living the one and only life that God has gifted you, so make it count.
Love,
Sarah and Shannon
On that note, let's celebrate being good today. We have some sweet giveaways and links to happy places below:
- Our mantra for the day is BE A NICE HUMAN! And guess what? Our dear friend launched a company built to inspire just that! Our new favorite tank reminds everyone we meet to behave nicely in a modern, graphically pleasing font (bonus!). Danielle has generously offered a shirt, bag, candle and bracelet to one lucky person! Sidenote: you'll want to buy some for everyone you know, so here is their facebook page (where they happen to be hosting a giveaway of their own, so go check it out!).
- We are all works-in-progress. The Finishing School is a book we genuinely look forward to delving into! Several of our friends have also purchased the pre-order and we plan to work through the chapters together, encouraging one another along the way. Valerie of Val Marie Papers has generously offered a book for one of you!
- This little cardi/vest/sweater is the most versatile thing our my closets (yes, we both have one!). Dress it up, dress it down... Wear it as a long sleeveless vest or long-sleeved cozy cardi. Add a tank, skinnies & boots - and you're ready to hit the streets and make good things happen. One lucky winner will receive this beauty, but keep your eye on Buckle for restocks or similar items!
- Luxe by Virtue is a good friend's jewelry line. Tracy's pieces are stunning and available only through boutiques and high end retailers... and here for one lucky person! This brand stands for all of the things we love: goodness, righteousness, integrity, dignity, honor, nobility, purity and worthiness (a portion of all proceeds go to Giving Hope NOLA, dedicated to feeding needy elderly in New Orleans). We are so excited to share these pieces with one of you. You can see more of her glistening beauties by following her Instagram and you can purchase online at Shop Bella Vita.
I have been a constant target for relentless bullying, ridicule, and criticism for most of my life. I started gaining weight when I was in the second grade, and every day after that, my classmates took it upon themselves to make me feel like I was nothing. Many, many days I would come home from school and survey the contents of our medicine cabinet, wondering if all of the random pills inside would be able to put an end to my horrible life. But I was never able to fully commit to that decision because of love. I knew, beyond a shadow of a doubt, that my parents loved me. They told me every day, and never missed an opportunity to tell me how proud they were to be my parents. I remember one day I was in a department store with my mom, and this woman was staring at me. My mom walked right up to her and said “What the hell are you looking at?” She was…my hero, and my best friend. Now that I’m a mother to two children, I sometimes lie awake at night, overcome with fear and anxiety, that they too will experience the pain that I felt as a child. My son starts kindergarten next week, and I have tried more times than I can count, to convince him to stay home and be homeschooled. I’m afraid. I’m afraid that his beautiful, loving heart will be crushed by the unkind words of others. But I tell him every day how much I love him. I tell him every day that I am so proud to be his momma. I tell him every day how I will always love him and be there for him no matter what. No matter what anyone else says or does, he can take solace in the fact that he is loved unconditionally by his mom and his dad, his family, and his Lord.It is also of the utmost importance to me, that my children never become the type of people who took such joy in my suffering. And so I do all I can to nourish their empathy for others. I tell them that they should always think about how they would feel if they were the kid being laughed at because he can’t seem to get the ball through the hoop, or the one who has frizzy hair, or wears glasses, or whose mom is overweight. I tell them that being different is what makes you special, that it’s way more fun than being just like everyone else, and it’s what makes the world interesting. I think if we all tried to raise our children to love, be loved, and to always stop and walk around in other peoples’ shoes before they judged them, the world would be a better place.
My best advice would be, get on your knees and pray. Pray daily for your children. Pray for guidance and strength. Encourage your children to be the best they can be and to be kind to others. You never know what kind of home someone else comes from and by just being kind you could change someone else’s life. The Bible is the greatest book to read and live by! I strive to give my babies the best life they can possibly have and the best thing I can do for them is just BE. Be there when they need me. Put the phone down, turn the TV off, step away from the computer (we are all guilty of these things) and just give them your undivided attention. I love this company and what Sarah and Shannon stand for. May God continue to bless each of your families! ❤️
Honestly? Lots and lots of prayer. I’m mom to a 22 month old girl and due with our first son in 2 weeks, and after recently starting to lock horns with my incredibly sweet, but incredibly willful toddler, I’ve realized more than ever how flawed and impatient I am as a human. Parenthood has a way of bringing all your flaws into sharp contrast like nothing else does, lol! I know I’m going to screw up. I’m going to totally blow it at times, and fail to have the love and patience I should…not only with my children, but with other people while my children are watching and learning from my actions. And it’s made me realize that the best thing I can do is pray for my kids. Pray for them to be good, loving, Godly people despite their imperfect parents. And that they’ll pick up the best of us rather than the worst. When my husband and I were in graduate school at Moody Bible Insitute in Chicago years ago, one of my professors with grown kids said that from the day they were born, he and his wife prayed the fruits of the spirit over their kids, and that stuck with me for 6 years until we had kids of our own. I haven’t been quite as dedicated as they were because I forget and miss days (or weeks) at a time, but I’ve been trying to pray Galatians 5:22-23 over them as much as I can! “But the fruit of the spirit is love, joy, peace, patience, kidness, goodness, faithfulness, and self-control.”…(and yes, I totally have to sing the children’s song in my head in order to remember them all as I’m praying, LOL!)
Lead by example! As a teacher, the most positive thing I can do on a daily basis is lead my students in the right direction. If I’m nice and happy, they are nice and happy. Positive role models make a difference! Be the positive sunshine in a life, not the rain cloud!
This is one I’ve had hanging in my office for a few ears now. I plan on teaching it to my girls as well. From Colossians;
Therefore, as God’s chosen people, holy and dearly loved, clothe yourselves with compassion, kindness, humility, gentleness and patience.