if not me...

Posted by Sarah



If not us, then who If not me and you Right now, it’s time for us to do something If not now, then when Will we see an end To all this pain It’s not enough to do nothing It’s time for us to do something ~ Matthew West


It is 1995 and a boy sits alone at the lunch table. He's skinny and quiet, wearing a tattered Polo shirt. His name is Don. He typically roams the halls during lunch to avoid scenes like this, but today he is starved... So he eats, dodging occasional cheeto bullets from the next table. It is Friday so pep rally excitement fills the air. Don stares at his food, likely battling an internal voice yelling GET UP! RUN AWAY! And perhaps the voice almost wins. He's picking up his half-eaten tray when a cheerleader takes the seat beside him. She glares at her friends who sheepishly put their chips away as she starts a conversation. His behavior is often odd, to be sure, but he means no harm (years later he will be diagnosed with Asperger Syndrome). The bell rings and she rises to leave. He flashes a cautious smile and holds his head a little higher. They don't become best friends or eat together every day, but this is the last time he will feel humiliated and alone in the cafeteria. A line has been drawn in the sand, and a light cast on mean behavior that will no longer be glorified or tolerated. One girl, one small act of courage and kindness changes everything.

What did her parents do? Why, in the midst so much wrong, did she choose RIGHT? And how can we grow little humans who will become assets to humanity?  Bullying, my friends, is alive and well... And not isolated to children. Social media has exacerbated the problem, allowing people to abuse one another behind the relative safety of their computers. And, good people, fearing they might be the next victim of widespread attacks, are unwilling to defend or protect the wronged. Like wildfire, negative news spreads, lies become truth, and wrongdoing is praised and passed on. Yikes. Thought it was hard being a kid in 1995? Good luck to our children if we don't make a stand now. We started Well Dressed Wolf with little more than a dream, a few sketches and our innocence. Somehow, little by little, our baby company started growing... and in just a few years has become something we never imagined. Along the way we have made friends (so many friends!). We've gained wisdom, honed our craft, learned valuable (sometimes costly!) lessons in business, and watched women come together for the good of each other and the world. We've celebrated babies being born and literally watched children grow up through pictures (wearing WDW!). In the early days, we jumped right into social media, joining the many groups that popped up in our name. Having never been involved in the underground world of children's clothing, it was a rush! Interacting with customers on such a personal level was thrilling and gratifying... Until it wasn't. Recently, we have stepped away from all groups (most of which are lovely places full of wonderful women!) because it was necessary. We didn't start this business to referee or participate in sparring factions of clothing lovers and buyers and sellers. We aren't politicians and have no desire to be. Our daily posts shouldn't be planned like a State of the Union address-- each word measured and monitored for potential hidden meaning or intention. We started this journey because we LOVE to design adorable things for your children and we LOVE getting to know so many good people who have rallied around our brand (and there are so many good people). In fact, a positive and inspiring community group will soon be launched exclusively for friends of Well Dressed Wolf. We hope you'll take part! We plan to pop in periodically and you'll get sneaks, make supportive friendships, take part in giveaways and have opportunities to help make the world a BETTER PLACE. It really is time to make social media a more positive experience again- for our children; for ourselves. Adults bullying one another and harassing businesses should never be okay.

As we tell our own children, you have CHOICES every day: seek darkness or seek light. Make a positive impact on the world or a negative one. Seek to inspire or to destroy. Do what you know is right- even when it isn't "cool". Don't seek revenge (no matter how much you want to!) and pray for the people who hurt you (this one is a toughie!). You aren't perfect and you'll make mistakes, so learn to apologize and forgive. Be honest, but be kind. Truth doesn't have to hurt... THESE are goals for our own lives (and business), and though we sometimes fall short, we are confident in the path we've chosen.

You're living the one and only life that God has gifted you, so make it count.

Love,

Sarah and Shannon

nicegiveaway

On that note, let's celebrate being good today. We have some sweet giveaways and links to happy places below:

  1. Our mantra for the day is BE A NICE HUMAN! And guess what? Our dear friend launched a company built to inspire just that! Our new favorite tank reminds everyone we meet to behave nicely in a modern, graphically pleasing font (bonus!). Danielle has generously offered a shirt, bag, candle and bracelet to one lucky person! Sidenote: you'll want to buy some for everyone you know, so here is their facebook page (where they happen to be hosting a giveaway of their own, so go check it out!).
  2. We are all works-in-progress. The Finishing School is a book we genuinely look forward to delving into! Several of our friends have also purchased the pre-order and we plan to work through the chapters together, encouraging one another along the way. Valerie of Val Marie Papers has generously offered a book for one of you!
  3. This little cardi/vest/sweater is the most versatile thing our my closets (yes, we both have one!). Dress it up, dress it down... Wear it as a long sleeveless vest or long-sleeved cozy cardi. Add a tank, skinnies & boots - and you're ready to hit the streets and make good things happen. One lucky winner will receive this beauty, but keep your eye on Buckle for restocks or similar items!
  4. Luxe by Virtue is a good friend's jewelry line. Tracy's pieces are stunning and available only through boutiques and high end retailers... and here for one lucky person! This brand stands for all of the things we love: goodness, righteousness, integrity, dignity, honor, nobility, purity and worthiness (a portion of all proceeds go to Giving Hope NOLA, dedicated to feeding needy elderly in New Orleans). We are so excited to share these pieces with one of you. You can see more of her glistening beauties by following her Instagram and you can purchase online at Shop Bella Vita.
So how do you win? Simply comment below with your BEST ADVICE to other parents about how to raise KIND, GOOD, COURAGEOUS little people. Include true stories, wisdom passed down from generation to generation or practical solutions! 4 winners will be selected from the comments and announced next Thursday. Also, help us support the fine businesses above by liking their pages!

496 comments

  • I try to be the person my daughter thinks I am…her hero!!! In reality, I am her hero even though I don’t always see it. With that said…I have to lead her by my example and teach her to trust in God. I am teaching her to “Do unto others and you would done unto you” and as my Mama always told me “If you can’t say anything nice…don’t say anything at all”! Also, teach her to take responsibility for her actions…good or bad. I’m just striving to be there for her and show her what kindness is so she can pass along to others.

    Kristin on
  • We teach our kids (4 boys between 13 and 7 and a 5 yr old girl) to look for those who are on the fringes and make a point to include them. I was the kid being bullied that no one noticed. Share your own story and show your kids that your human and know what they’re going through. Teach them to notice those kids and take a stand for them. We’re seeing that begin to be lived out as our kids get older. Our oldest has embraced this – he’s the “cool kid”. The one who rocks cross country, holds A++++ grades, knows everyone, the star goalie, the teacher’s pet in every class…if he can participate in it, he has and over-achieved it. Tall, athletic, super good looking. He spent last year eating lunch with a kid that he knows that is autistic. He worried when someone made a joke about mental illness in front of him and asked me to let the boy’s mom know in case it upset him. He saw someone get bullied and witness the lies the bully told the teacher and went to the principal to set the story straight. He can make the grouchiest cashier smile in seconds. He understands God’s acceptance and mercy and lives it right through the bullying he’d come through and into every other kid he meets. And we put our money where our mouth is. Each of our kids has picked a child through World Vision to support and our daughter was brought home from Russia (our 2nd son came with to bring her home and raised money to bring her baby house). Teach them to just look around. Everywhere they go. Just look. And then care enough to move.

    jessicalass on
  • In order to have respectable, kind, loving, good, courageous children we must as parents model this behavior ourselves as well as surround ourselves with those that do the same. Children are so impressionable..and smart. They look up to us for how to act so we must lead by example. Be there for them, have fun, laugh, listen, show them the ways, give hugs, lead with a cautious hand, exemplify love and teach them to do unto others as they would like to them.

    Dana York on
  • Our children mimic us… Therefore the best way for me to teach my child is to show them my kindness, generosity and compassion for others.

    Jessica McGuirk on
  • Be present, everyone is busy but put the phones and electronics down. I feel that just talking to your children and letting them know they can talk to you about anything. Love them unconditionally. Children that are confident in being themselves usually don’t bully, we all have the responsibility to be there for each other. Love those babies because the time just flies!

    Kathy chamberlain on


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