if not me...

Posted by Sarah



If not us, then who If not me and you Right now, it’s time for us to do something If not now, then when Will we see an end To all this pain It’s not enough to do nothing It’s time for us to do something ~ Matthew West


It is 1995 and a boy sits alone at the lunch table. He's skinny and quiet, wearing a tattered Polo shirt. His name is Don. He typically roams the halls during lunch to avoid scenes like this, but today he is starved... So he eats, dodging occasional cheeto bullets from the next table. It is Friday so pep rally excitement fills the air. Don stares at his food, likely battling an internal voice yelling GET UP! RUN AWAY! And perhaps the voice almost wins. He's picking up his half-eaten tray when a cheerleader takes the seat beside him. She glares at her friends who sheepishly put their chips away as she starts a conversation. His behavior is often odd, to be sure, but he means no harm (years later he will be diagnosed with Asperger Syndrome). The bell rings and she rises to leave. He flashes a cautious smile and holds his head a little higher. They don't become best friends or eat together every day, but this is the last time he will feel humiliated and alone in the cafeteria. A line has been drawn in the sand, and a light cast on mean behavior that will no longer be glorified or tolerated. One girl, one small act of courage and kindness changes everything.

What did her parents do? Why, in the midst so much wrong, did she choose RIGHT? And how can we grow little humans who will become assets to humanity?  Bullying, my friends, is alive and well... And not isolated to children. Social media has exacerbated the problem, allowing people to abuse one another behind the relative safety of their computers. And, good people, fearing they might be the next victim of widespread attacks, are unwilling to defend or protect the wronged. Like wildfire, negative news spreads, lies become truth, and wrongdoing is praised and passed on. Yikes. Thought it was hard being a kid in 1995? Good luck to our children if we don't make a stand now. We started Well Dressed Wolf with little more than a dream, a few sketches and our innocence. Somehow, little by little, our baby company started growing... and in just a few years has become something we never imagined. Along the way we have made friends (so many friends!). We've gained wisdom, honed our craft, learned valuable (sometimes costly!) lessons in business, and watched women come together for the good of each other and the world. We've celebrated babies being born and literally watched children grow up through pictures (wearing WDW!). In the early days, we jumped right into social media, joining the many groups that popped up in our name. Having never been involved in the underground world of children's clothing, it was a rush! Interacting with customers on such a personal level was thrilling and gratifying... Until it wasn't. Recently, we have stepped away from all groups (most of which are lovely places full of wonderful women!) because it was necessary. We didn't start this business to referee or participate in sparring factions of clothing lovers and buyers and sellers. We aren't politicians and have no desire to be. Our daily posts shouldn't be planned like a State of the Union address-- each word measured and monitored for potential hidden meaning or intention. We started this journey because we LOVE to design adorable things for your children and we LOVE getting to know so many good people who have rallied around our brand (and there are so many good people). In fact, a positive and inspiring community group will soon be launched exclusively for friends of Well Dressed Wolf. We hope you'll take part! We plan to pop in periodically and you'll get sneaks, make supportive friendships, take part in giveaways and have opportunities to help make the world a BETTER PLACE. It really is time to make social media a more positive experience again- for our children; for ourselves. Adults bullying one another and harassing businesses should never be okay.

As we tell our own children, you have CHOICES every day: seek darkness or seek light. Make a positive impact on the world or a negative one. Seek to inspire or to destroy. Do what you know is right- even when it isn't "cool". Don't seek revenge (no matter how much you want to!) and pray for the people who hurt you (this one is a toughie!). You aren't perfect and you'll make mistakes, so learn to apologize and forgive. Be honest, but be kind. Truth doesn't have to hurt... THESE are goals for our own lives (and business), and though we sometimes fall short, we are confident in the path we've chosen.

You're living the one and only life that God has gifted you, so make it count.

Love,

Sarah and Shannon

nicegiveaway

On that note, let's celebrate being good today. We have some sweet giveaways and links to happy places below:

  1. Our mantra for the day is BE A NICE HUMAN! And guess what? Our dear friend launched a company built to inspire just that! Our new favorite tank reminds everyone we meet to behave nicely in a modern, graphically pleasing font (bonus!). Danielle has generously offered a shirt, bag, candle and bracelet to one lucky person! Sidenote: you'll want to buy some for everyone you know, so here is their facebook page (where they happen to be hosting a giveaway of their own, so go check it out!).
  2. We are all works-in-progress. The Finishing School is a book we genuinely look forward to delving into! Several of our friends have also purchased the pre-order and we plan to work through the chapters together, encouraging one another along the way. Valerie of Val Marie Papers has generously offered a book for one of you!
  3. This little cardi/vest/sweater is the most versatile thing our my closets (yes, we both have one!). Dress it up, dress it down... Wear it as a long sleeveless vest or long-sleeved cozy cardi. Add a tank, skinnies & boots - and you're ready to hit the streets and make good things happen. One lucky winner will receive this beauty, but keep your eye on Buckle for restocks or similar items!
  4. Luxe by Virtue is a good friend's jewelry line. Tracy's pieces are stunning and available only through boutiques and high end retailers... and here for one lucky person! This brand stands for all of the things we love: goodness, righteousness, integrity, dignity, honor, nobility, purity and worthiness (a portion of all proceeds go to Giving Hope NOLA, dedicated to feeding needy elderly in New Orleans). We are so excited to share these pieces with one of you. You can see more of her glistening beauties by following her Instagram and you can purchase online at Shop Bella Vita.
So how do you win? Simply comment below with your BEST ADVICE to other parents about how to raise KIND, GOOD, COURAGEOUS little people. Include true stories, wisdom passed down from generation to generation or practical solutions! 4 winners will be selected from the comments and announced next Thursday. Also, help us support the fine businesses above by liking their pages!

496 comments

  • The most important thing is to be a leader yourself. Show them what kindness is by being kind. Show them what goodness is by being good. Model courageous behavior and don’t be afraid to tell them when you’re afraid or that you were scared to drop the training wheels too.

    Children learn what they live. If they live in abuse, pain, and neglect — that’s what they’ll learn. And that’s what they’ll pass on to their kids and their community as they grow.

    But if your children live with good, kind, courageous people then that’s what they’ll learn.

    Kelli Butterfield on
  • I can only think of my oldest daughter as I read this blog post. She’ll be 16 next week and ever since she was 4 years old, I’ve called her my “Justice Warrior”. I’ve always modeled kindness for her, but there is a spark inside her that I cannot take credit for. She has this unparalleled drive to do right by others and to make sure everyone around her does the same. Whether that be standing up in front of the mean girls on the playground to keep them from picking on her friend or (most recently) having a talk with her band instructor after he yelled at her classmate for playing the wrong notes. I think in some ways our own experiences shape how we treat others, but on the other hand we are also in control of our reactions to the world around us. It starts with teaching manners and respect, not just for other people, but a true respect for your surroundings…..your parents, your siblings, your community, animals, etc. Teaching my children to give to the world instead of take and to stand when someone or something is being wronged no matter the consequences to themselves. We talk about these things every day.

    Amanda on
  • We try to show our children the kindness we preach. Show how to help others, use kind words in action and treat others as you would want to be treated. It’s hard some days….repeating ‘nice hands’ to our 18mths old. I just hope they know how much we try to be good people and do good things in this tough world. I’m their only mother so I try to set a good example. ❤

    Nicole pelick on
  • My best advice is to teach them to love God first and try to live like him! My daughter is 7 and has an amazing soul! I’ve learned by watching her growth with Christ that she is becoming the kind of person I need to strive to be! My next piece would be to pray frequently! Ask for guidance from him! Praise him for his blessings! Enjoy your time with your children! Think… We only get approx 18 summers, 18 Halloweens & 18 Christmas mornings with them as our “babies” before they start becoming adults themselves! Cherish those! Laugh, act silly and just making memories! Most of all Pray WITH them! As a family! Be an example of what God wants us to be! Teach them how Jesus treated others, knowing their son, their downfalls and unkind behavior! Teach them that we all have issues in our lives and we all sin….. No ones problems or sins are better than anyone else’s! We all have deamons and we all need just a little bit of Love and a whole lot of Grace!

    Btw: we LOVE Matthew West!!!

    Kailee on
  • Love this post. Its so important that our children grow to understand each day is blessing, regardless of what they are handed. Be courageous, strong, and free spirited . Do unto others as you would have do unto you!!! Most importantly love God…

    Heather on


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